Never noticed it before

Person #1: Oh, I wanna get this album from HMV, is there one around here?
Person #2: Bloody hell, we’ve passed by 3 HMV’s in the past 20 minutes!
– Overheard in Toronto at the south end of Yonge & Bloor, past Manulife Centre

Mushroom Feet

Man on balcony (wearing toadstool fluffy slippers): These mushrooms are killing my toes!
His friend: Keep your sweaty Super Marios away from my drink!
– Overheard in Toronto on Close Ave (South of King)

Waste Not, Want Not

Little boy: Mommy can I have my train please.
Mother: Drink your milk first, then I’ll give you the train.
* little boy takes a gulp of the milk then pours the rest of it unto the floor *
Mother, shocked: Why did you do that?!
Little boy says quietly: I wanted the train and you said finish it, […]

Kinky Lotion

* Girl #1 fishes out a small bottle of lotion from her bag and turns to her friend *
Girl #1: Could you put some lotion on me please…
Girl #2: No.
* Girl #1 continues talking as if if not interrupted *
Girl #1: …because God knows I’ve put enough lotion on you.
– Overheard in Toronto at the […]

But They Probably Remember Her

guy (on his cell): Sorry, I can’t keep straight all of the places where you threw up on the bar.
– Overheard in Toronto in a streetcar on College

Hallmark moment

* a couple is holding a birthday card and a pen *
guy: Write something nice on the card.
girl: No. The card is my prostitute. I pay the card to have feelings for me.
– Overheard in Toronto on the subway, around Rosedale stop